...LiFe iS BeauTifuL... Njoi…!!!

Isn’t it true ?? When we get angry with someone, we are the ones who are burning inside with anger. We feel that if we forgive that person then we will be doing that person a favor but the reality is that if we just let it go and forgive the person we are angry with then we will be doing OURSELVES the biggest favor. At the end self -love is the greatest love so we can always do ourselves this favor .

To make mistakes is part of the human condition and if you prefer it in a sweeter way. "There are no mistakes, only lessons to learn." It does not matter what you think about it: You do the same actions again and again as well as every one of us. It is important to make a balance of what we have done wrong in the past to find a way to forgive us as well as forgive others.

We don’t realize but we are the ones who suffer when we hold on to that anger. Sometimes the person we are angry with doesn’t even know what we are going through but we continue to break from inside. I know anger is a really powerful emotion and it tends to take complete control of you but if we become conscious of our anger and know that it will for our good to let it go then it will definitely help. It’s a slow process but works. It’s very natural to forget about these philosophies when we are angry but if we can remind ourselves of it once in 10 times, it’s still good.

Some people are not able to forgive others as well as themselves. They think that to forgive is something so dramatic that they would not even consider using that word as part of their vocabulary. It is noble to forgive. It cleanses the soul and creates a vacuum to fulfil life with good.

Many of us can think of someone who has hurt us badly. How difficult it can be for us to forgive that person. Even if we avoid seeking revenge, we may hold on to a grudge. Our society doesn't encourage forgiveness. On the contrary, when we are hurt we are told: "Don't get angry; get even!" The plots of many popular dramas focus on "sweet revenge." Yet we know that it is right to forgive and forget. Everybody remembers Mother Teresa's famous quote, "It is by forgiving that one is forgiven". Since we all know that friendship flourishes at the fountain of forgiveness, why is it still so difficult to forgive and forget? "If that person would die today, are you sure you would keep so much resentment and hatred in your heart? Would it be worth it?" "Forgive and forget, at least to a level where you can develop a relationship with that person again and not becoming a judge". We are a perfect creation of God and sometimes we are too harsh with people we love and with ourselves.

Forgiveness, I know it's hard. Especially, when somebody has done wrong with you, when people have been nasty towards you, when they’ve been bad mouthing about you, when they've abused you. I know it's hard. But guess what? You should forgive them. I did. Not once not twice, but numerous times, and that too the same person, coz I care. I don't care if they've murdered someone you love. Forgive them. Here's why: If you forgive them, then you don't have to carry around with you the reason why you cannot forgive them. You don't have to carry that hurt. That reason. No, let it go. Throw it away. You can't change what has happened. No matter how hard you hate that person. It will not change a thing. Apart from you. You may become bitter, twisted and all gnarled inside. After all, you'll have to carry all that hate around with you. All those reasons why you can't possibly forgive that person. All that bile inside you. Do yourself a favour. Throw it all away. Forgive that person. Forgive their deeds. Move on. They don't even have to know that you've forgiven them. They probably don't care anyway. What matters is YOU. The moment that you forgive someone you will feel INSTANTLY lighter. No longer weighed down by the massive load on your shoulders.

If I am saying all this today, it’s with my personal experiences. Even I have been hurt and been through all of this. I carried that pain with me for a long time, but the day I decided to forgive that person, I felt free. Free of all that was being a burden inside me. Everything that was stopping me from doing what I want. Today, despite of everything, I still care for the person, support them, instead call them my besties. People who love you, will hurt you no matter what.  

While I'm talking about forgiveness I am guessing that you haven't led a perfect life. I am guessing that somewhere in your closet is a thought or deed that you're ashamed of. At best, something you're not proud of. Well, do yourself a favour. Forgive yourself. I don't care what you've done. Forgive yourself. Whipping yourself again and again is not going to change a thing. It's just going to make hurt. What's the point? What you've done is done. Move on. Move forward, but without those whips, chains and yokes of the past. By the way, I guess I should finish talking about the past. Because while I'm in this guessing mood, I guess that your past hasn't gone exactly as you'd hoped. That your life is not all that you'd planned. That you've made mistakes, taken some wrong turns., even made some bad decisions.

Well, get over it. Forget it. Forgive it. Forgive yourself. It's the past. It's done. Time only works one way (for now). Until that time machine gets invented, we're stuck with just moving forward, with no chance of a rewind and re-edit. Forgive it all. Forgive others. Forgive yourself. Forgive the past. For no other reason that YOU will find it's a lot lighter and easier going forward.

There are lots of beautiful things around us. It's just a matter of how we see it and whether we're able to realize it. In life, of course there are always some ups and downs. However, I believe, that even in the most difficult situation, there's always a beautiful thing.. As wise people say, "Everything happens for a reason". enjoy! :)

Unconditional Love-Exists???

Isn’t it funny. We expect and demand someone to give us what we are not willing to give. Unconditional love. If we expect that from someone to make us feel safe and loved, wanted and desired, don’t we have to understand what it is? Don’t we have to feel it for ourselves before we can accept or expect anyone else to give it to us?

Unconditional love is a term that means to love someone regardless of the loved one's qualities or actions.

Does it really exist in today’s world?? Can we love someone without expecting anything in return?

People say there are no conditions to God's Love. Do you understand and agree, that unconditional means no conditions apply?". Think before reading ahead and think hard. If God’s love is unconditional, why do we nearly bribe him saying “if my wish comes true, will do this and that??”. If you believe that unconditional love does not need anything in return, why is God being bribed for the so-called unconditional Love from him? I am not against god, I firmly believe in God, but there are a few things I always worry about.

Or, if I talk about a mothers love for their kids. It is always said that a mother never expects anything in return. But I have a different perspective even here. Some or the other time in life, even mothers expect things in return from their kids. Will they agree to everything the kid says?? I don’t think so. So it is unconditional love?

One must work through painful experiences that create anger or bitterness in you. Why did it happen? What was the lesson to be learned in it? Be grateful for the people that were put in your path to help you with that lesson, rather than resenting them for hurting you. It is absolutely impossible to unconditionally love yourself if you harbor bitterness, anger, guilt or any other feelings that are not love. I believe unconditional love exists, but not the way people say it exists.  But still there is dignity in not giving up on someone you truly love. But there is more dignity in letting them go so they can experience better love. That shows your true love because you then become unselfish, and through putting others first, unconditional love grows. There is respect in fighting gallantly to win someone's heart another time, but an even greater respect comes from fighting hard and knowing when to stop. Even though you would give anything to have the past back, that person has touched your life in a way that will make your future so much brighter.

Recalling the event or person will give you a starting point. Recall the people involved, recall how you felt, and what should have happened instead to meet your needs. How would you handle it today, knowing that you deserve to get your needs met, knowing that you deserve unconditional love, and knowing that in order to receive unconditional love you need to give it.

Accept that, and hold your head high, knowing you have captured their heart as well. ‘Coz there is courage in allowing your heart to hurt and grieve. But there is a greater courage in knowing it will be scarred but stronger as time goes on. For whoever caused those scars has made your life better in some way because of what the scars taught you. Remember how many people depend on you and who you are the world to. There is fortitude in holding on for another chance although an even greater fortitude comes from extending your hand and heart in friendship, realizing you will still share things with that person, No one else ever will.

Feel the pain that the event and people caused you. Go deep inside, feel the anger, feel the hurt, feel the rejection, feel the disapproval, feel how alone you were at that moment in your life. Cry.Cry. Cry. And when you are through crying all of the tears you have over it, think for a moment how that situation would be handled today, knowing that you deserve to get your needs met, knowing you deserve unconditional love, and knowing in order to receive unconditional love you need to give it. And finally, release the past, release the pain, and forgive. Forgive means to stop being angry about or resentful against, to relieve from payment of. To relieve from payment of the past is the step that will bring you to unconditional love. The world owes you nothing. You were born deserving it, so was everyone else. We are here on our journey’s to help each other heal.

You will always have those looks and jokes as your memories. Don't ever discount how special those things are in your heart and theirs. True love hurts when it is lost, but an even greater love grows inside yourself through realization that something better is in the world for both of you. And that there are still things to share with that person, even though some feelings may have changed.

Take their hand and help them achieve their hopes and dreams

Because in that there is dignity, respect, courage, humility, fortitude,

And the unconditional love that will continue to grow in both of your hearts.

The bottom line is that you cannot live your life unconditionally because you live in a physical world that is conditional. However, it doesn't stop me from experiencing unconditional love maybe because I have a different philosophy from what people generally have. But, think and tell me honestly, does it really exist??

“The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well”

Let Go ...!!!

Let's face it. Many of us choose to hang on to things or people that at some point have hurt us, angered us, made us feel sad, or depressed us. If we choose to hang on to them, we will never move forward and we could even create physical or medical damage to our bodies. To prevent this from happening we need to let go but no one really tells you how to let go and move forward. Sure it's easy to say: "Just let go, move forward, forget about it, just let go." But does that really work???

One of the most profound, and simplest, natural abilities we have as human beings is to let go. Upon letting go there's a world of possibilities open to us. Holding on is also an ability, but is habitual, not natural, and leads to the impossible.

Throughout our lives we go through different experiences, some are positive and some we see as negative and unpleasant. When you hang on to a negative or unpleasant experience you are constantly thinking about it. And when you constantly think about that negative event you prevent yourself from healing. How many pleasant memories do you recall everyday? Chances are you're like most people and you have a number of unpleasant experiences that you're holding on to, which is preventing you from moving forward.

When you find yourself attached, remember that ‘letting go’ is not ‘getting rid of’. I might think that I have to throw it away because I’m attached to it, but that would just be the desire to get rid of it. We tend to think that getting rid of the object is a way of getting rid of attachment.

The more you carry, the worse life gets. Why? Because you've filled your mind up with negative experiences, because you continually hang on to something that doesn't allow you to move forward, in short, you're carrying useless baggage that's really slowing you down.

How do you let go of things? This means you leave them as they are; it does not mean you destroy them or throw them away. It is more like setting down and letting them be. If we contemplate, desires and listen to them, we are actually no longer attaching to them; we are just allowing them to be the way they are. Then we come to the realisation that the origin of suffering, desire, can be laid aside and let go of. You have to find this out through practice so that you will know for yourself how to let go of the origin of suffering. Can you let go of desire by wanting to let go of it? What is it that is really letting go in a given moment? You have to contemplate the experience of letting go and really examine and investigate until the insight comes. This does not mean that you are going to let go of desire forever but, at that one moment, you actually have let go and you have done it in full conscious awareness. There is an insight then. This is what we call insight knowledge.

To let go you have to get your mind to focus on different goals and different objectives. It's not about saying: I let go of the pain from my fight with and move on. That will help, but if you really want to start moving on, then you have to get your mind to focus on new things, in the process you automatically let go of the things that have been slowing you down.

So the way is always working with the moments of daily life. When you are feeling depressed and negative, just the moment that you refuse to indulge in that feeling is an enlightenment experience. When you see that, you need not sink into the sea of depression and despair and wallow in it. You can actually stop by learning not to give things a second thought.

Now with personal problems and obsessions, to let go of them is just that much. It is not a matter of analysing and endlessly making more of a problem about them, but of practising that state of leaving things alone, letting go of them. At first, you let go but then you pick them up again because the habit of grasping is so strong. But at least you have the idea. Even when I had that insight into letting go, I let go for a moment but then I started grasping by thinking: ‘I can’t do it, I have so many bad habits!’ But don’t trust that kind of nagging, disparaging thing in yourself. It is totally untrustworthy. It is just a matter of practising letting go. The more you begin to see how to do it, then the more you are able to sustain the state of non-attachment.

Live in the present moment, to start living in the now. Living in the now is different than living for the moment. Living in the now is the process of enjoying everything that is going on at this present moment. Take a look around you and appreciate those things that you once thought were trivial. Focus on a few of the positive things anything from nature to the wonderful family you may have. This forces your mind to look at things differently and tells your subconscious mind that you're ready for new possibilities,